Facebook, for example, tends to be, for my age-group in particular, quite an addictive procrastination tool. I follow many lifestyle, news, esoteric, political and comedy pages and I spend most of my time on the site, reading articles or watching videos they post. As much as I care about the people I'm friends with on Facebook, I avoid reading most of their contributions. This is for a few reasons;
- Perfect Life Posting - People tend to make their lives look fantastic, and if I'm plodding along in mine, I don't need to be reminded how great yours is going.
- The Inevitable Accidental FB Stalker Syndrome - I don't want to know everything about you before I see you because I feel like I'm stalking you.
- Soapbox rants
- Overposting and TMI
It's been in the media quite a lot recently, the detrimental effects of social media, such as Facebook and Instagram, on the users' mental health. There is more and more research into the link between online social networks and depression. It seems to be effecting teenage girls especially hard but none of us are immune.
My main reason for not frequenting social media sites is definitely the most destructive to my mental health. I suffered with depression brought on by my work in the music industry. It's a very difficult, superficial and dog eat dog industry to work in. I'm aware of many people suffering in one way or another because of their involvement. But, I know many people who are very successful in the field. Although I wish them no ill will, I find it very difficult to see their every success and movement catalogued on my news feed in an almost, "this is what you could've won" stream of photos and statements. It isn't always work related posts that can leave me feeling melancholy, but life goals being met (holidays, weddings, babies) that I haven't experienced (as yet).
I realise that the latter is a systematic problem in society as people are working harder throughout their twenties and putting off their personal lives for the sake of their work ones and because the cost of living is so high at present. But I believe this feeling I have in regards to other people's social media posts, is shared by many users. One of the biggest problems with social media is that we have all started self-marketing our personal lives to our friends and acquaintances. We cherry-pick moments to share, we create a moment so we have something to post, we sell our best selves all in the attempt of impressing our network. The trouble is, we're not only damaging ourselves by living a fake online existence with which our real lives don't match up, but we're also potentially hurting other users in the process, people we care about.
Our grandparents are lucky to have lived their youth in a smaller world without the internet. If you don't know what you're missing, you can't miss it. This is becoming one of my mantras. The more time I spend thinking about the positives in my life and mentally taking note of everything I enjoy and the less time I spend viewing other peoples' lives through the social media window, the less likely it is that I fall into a depressed, melancholy state. We forget, here in the first world, how fortunate we are just to have somewhere to live and food to eat.
But I think about this a lot.
I focus on it.
I distill my life down into only the positives:
I am fortunate to own a house
I am fortunate to be in a loving relationship
I am fortunate to have a job which allows me to do my hobby/passion for money
I am fortunate to have a job that makes me "time rich"
I am fortunate to have an amazingly supportive and loving family
I am fortunate to live in the countryside
I am fortunate to have intelligent, warm, generous friends
I am fortunate to afford a car
I am fortunate to have some expendable income
The list goes on. And when the list goes on, you start to believe it, you start to understand and put it all into perspective. You start to see what you do have and forget what you don't. I would suggest that anyone feeling in any way despondent, write as many things as they can about what they do like about their life. I also suggest limiting exposure to social media and also being mindful of what you post. Be truthful, be honest. Be skeptical of everything you watch and read and put it all into perspective; you only get to see a snapshot of the best parts of other peoples' lives. Turn of your phone and be present in your own life.
"Happiness is not a goal. It's a by-product of a life well lived." - Eleanor Roosevelt
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/smartphone-social-media-apps-mental-health-negative-check-plugged-in-communication-technology-a7600686.html
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/may/25/antisocial-network-how-self-deprecation-is-taking-over-the-internet
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/carrie-kirk/why-im-antisocial-media_b_5961252.html
https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/blog/social-media-and-young-peoples-mental-health
